Bubble Bubble Covid Trouble: Ruminations and Procrastinations of the Past (crazy) Year

Wowzers. I still can’t get over what an incredibly weird time this is. Coronavirus is now ingrained in our collective consciousness and it’s getting rarer and rarer to meet anyone who has not been deeply personally affected by this crisis. I feel extremely lucky that my family and I have had the resources to survive, and even luckier that I am branching out in the online business world and not having to physically go out into the world all that much, and grateful that I was already on the path to stepping into the online space and spreading this work I am so deeply connected to with the world (or at least the people who think what I do might be worth exploring!).  

BUT I still have to pinch myself to remind this human that I NEED to ‘give myself a break’ regularly when feeling completely and hopelessly lost, driven to distraction by my beautiful but exhausting 3 year old and generally just wallowing in a pit of despair, procrastination and complete and utter inability to get what I need to get done! It’s ok. You are human, this is all an unknown, weird, alien, core-shaking state of affairs and unless you’re lucky enough to be living on a remote island, or under a rock, you are probably FEELING. IT. ALL.

I remember to check the headlines and BAM! More news of the true horror and continued devastating effect this is having across the world and I remind myself to not to (mentally) beat myself up, there is no immediate rush, no one is on my shoulder hounding me to be productive.  I can trust that sometimes this human needs a flippin’ break! (and it’s ok to watch the billionth episode of The Walking Dead, honestly, I’m clearly gaining valuable post-apocalyptic knowledge right??).

So, my major procrastination has been in writing and filming my exciting inaugural course: Moving Humans. I have ideas, a structure and I know it will cover the fundamental concepts in my work with everyday humans, the work I’ve honed, developed and taught over 2 decades.  I guess the most difficult part in this process has simply been not seeing people, not having that easily accessible sounding board with friends and colleagues in my field, feeling somewhat isolated from my local dance community and even my own wonderful dance community: Oxford Youth Dance.  My weekly zoom lessons with those children and families really have saved me: hearing news, no matter how trivial, on a regular basis from real people I used to physically interact with regularly is where it’s at. Watching free flowing and joyful movement come as a result of my gentle hints and suggestions is just SO satisfying and soul fulfilling, and it reminds me to do what I love best…just dance.

I’ve definitely been a victim of doom-scrolling (thanks for the term Charlie Brooker 😜), getting far too caught up in the conspiratorial codswallop that has been multiplying at truly terrifying rates.  I found a safe haven in the Conspirituality podcast (look it up, well worth a listen)…it’s given me gentle reminders that although some of the ‘wellness’ sphere I appear to be entering with my embodied dance business, has fallen prey to some of the dangerous rhetoric doing the rounds, thankfully many creative people like myself; who manage to weave science and the more mysterious parts of the universe together in their work, are succeeding in steering clear of the worst of the fear-mongering and polarisation. I’m a flawed human but I’ve always felt strongly that we are all one, all connected, all essentially the same living breathing hot-messes, all subject to pain, trauma, abuse, oppression and ALL of the (scary) things. But I must admit it’s been hard not to get angry and play the blame game when looking at the current state of the world, the merging of parts of the right and left for (in my mind) all the ‘wrong’ reasons. I’m trying to let this go, accept that it’s no surprise that we have all taken some funny turns this past year, it’s no surprise that we all try to find solace in things that appeal to our humanity, even if they are a little bit skewed for people on the other side of the coin. Let’s pledge to make 2021 the year of supporting one another, moving together and most of all striving to be kind as we emerge from a pandemic of epic proportions.

“I need a lie-down Mummy”

Since the tragedy of George Floyd (and so many others) and the remarkable protests, events and solidarity around the world with Black Lives Matter, I’ve also been more vigorously and consciously ‘doing the work’, listening and learning daily how to be anti-racist whilst making no apologies for standing up for my belief in a fairer more equitable society.  Seeking out black and minority voices, literature, companies and courses to support, all of which force me to do better. Facing head-on the deep work that needs to happen to make my physical and online courses actually diverse and not simply in a false, tokenistic way. I have known for a while, even pre-covid and BLM, that I urgently need to visit the communities and areas I work in to seek out families that might benefit from this work and provide information, funding and support to those who wish to join and help strengthen a dance community that was previously seemingly out of reach, perhaps (probably) too white/middle class/yummy mummy/not truly inclusive to all, despite that being one of our biggest claims. It’s my job to continuously do the work. I urgently want the Every Body Dances Community and my physical communities in Oxfordshire, to be a moving, breathing representation of a beautifully messy, playful, energetic, authentic and most of all joyful space, pulling together humans from ALL walks of life to enjoy what humans have done best since we first descended from the trees: DANCING: together, alone and always.

Thank you for reading 💜, this post has been bubbling on the surface for a while and it feels good to finally let some of the ‘bleurgh’ out! I’m so excited to be launching Moving Humans in the next month or two (life/covid/childcare depending!!). In the meantime, please do visit our gorgeous website: www.everybodydances.co.uk/ designed by the talented Olivia at Ardea Creative. Hop onto the EBD mailing list and have a go at my Lockdown Dance Toolkit. Like our page www.facebook.com/everybodydances.ox  Join our facebook community www.facebook.com/groups/everybodydancescommunity and most of all keep your eyes peeled 👀 for the drop of our exciting NEW online space with free and paid memberships available; a space to hangout and chat with like minded dancing humans, join courses, classes and workshops, find resources and much more (all designed by Marcelo Rothen from Ardea and Tarrafa Digital, all the way over in sunny Brazil 🇧🇷)!

Sneak peak at the Portal

Watch. This. Space.

Stay safe and healthy you beautiful humans and don’t forget to keep dancing! 🤸🏻‍♂️ 💜💜

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